Wednesday, February 1, 2012

top 5 pearls of wisdom from the monkey of all grandmas {aka Earth Monkeys own super cool grandma!}

Lindsay brought out an oldie but goodie last week about unsolicited advice.
This in turn brought out the advice monster in her mother. I am after all the Queen of 'Do as I say not as I did', for this blog site anyway. So to quote an old bumper sticker: Get in, sit down, shut up and hold on as I am about to sum it all up, put it in the proverbial nut shell if you will. That's right ladies, mamas and the occasional daddy blog reader, here it is...

"The top 5 Pearls of Wisdom from the monkey of all grammas or is it the gramma of all monkeys?" 

Let's just bring it all out and get it over with...side note: this is minus the infamous marriage advice edition, we'll save that for another blog on another day...
#1. COMPLAIN ABOUT NOTHING - Go ahead give it a try. When we master this pigs will fly over the earth. It would impact every fiber of our being and our husband's being.

#2. NEVER COMPARE YOURSELF (or your children and partner) TO ANYONE ELSE- Seriously, think this through and just imagine the positive repercussions.

#3. DO WHAT YOU DREAD- Yes even you type A's. We all have dreads we avoid like the plague. Imagine life having conquered the dreads first.

#4. BEHAVE THE WAY YOU WISH YOU FELT- Relationships are key whether you're struggling with a spouse, a child, a mama or a friend. Nothing grieves the Spirit and makes
satan leap for joy like broken relationships.

And finally....: drum roll please...............................

#5. NEVER, EVER, NO MATTER WHO, WHAT OR WHERE, NEVER ASSUME!!!! Let's pretend you're having a conversation with the hubby or your sister or your CPA. He/she responds to you and that little alarm goes off in your head that in reality you know (because you are a certified mind reader) there is hidden meaning in their words. And-- while you may very well be 'certified' it isn't in mind reading sister--- so you then REACT to what you ASSUME he/she means... here's a short story that might make my point more clear. It came to me from...well we'll just call her Jane to protect her identity. Please don't be offended by the content, it seems necessary

A guy goes to the supermarket and notices an attractive woman waiving at him. She says hello. He's taken aback because he can't remember where he knows her from.
So he says, "Do you know me?" To which she replies, "I think you're the father of one of my kids." Now his mind travels back to a time he'd rather forget and he says,"Are you the stripper from the bachelor party that I made love to on the pool table?" She looks into his eyes and says calmly, "No I'm your son's teacher."NEVER ASSUME....... BECAUSE I SAID SO

Anyone else brave enough to offer up their best unsolicited advice today??? Comment below if you dare ;)...and share us with your friends if you love us!!!

Cindy... I am the official EMG, AKA: Earth Monkey G-ma. I've earned this title more by default than performance. I am a 55 year old mother of 5 and gramma to 9 and my greatest achievements are my kids. We are a blended family kind of like the Brady Bunch... if you can picture the Brady's with knives. While I'm far too quick with unsolicited advice, I'm a fairly good example of "Do as I say, not as I did."
Check out Cindy's personal blog
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